What next?

Over the past couple of weeks my head has been filled with ideas on what to write next. There are sooooo many things racing around in my head, I just don't know where to start, or indeed where to end, some of the ideas that I have.

For instance, I am finding that there are many many things that I want to discuss about the growing influence of my coach (Geoff Williamson) and how positive I am about what he is doing for me. Aside from the challenging, interesting and varied program that he is developing for me, there is the psychological component - he has a great knack of instilling confidence in me and of making me expect more of my own ability.

This latter point is also something that is coming through from comments of people that have emailed me and that I have chatted with me. I have discussed this in earlier posts, but it something that I want to explore more; I want to be able to include their 'voice' in this blog, as they are all part of this story.

I also want to reflect on my reading of Dean Karnazes Ultramarathon Man, the first book I have read cover to cover in a very long time and one that I know will have a considerable influence on me, but not necessarily in a way that it might for most that read it.

One of the things that 'Karno' has taught me is that my endeavour doesn't have to be completely selfish and there are ways that I can make a difference for others. 'Giving back' is something that has been nagging me for many years, not just since I started training for Challenge Wanaka. Now I have the opportunity to give back, I am faced with the dilemma of who to give back to and how exactly to do it.

Then there is my deep desire to continue the story of my accident, starting with waking up in ICU as a very frightened and vulnerable individual. This is a difficult part of the story to tell not only because of the intense emotions that I experienced and find hard to describe, but because my memory is a jumble of drug-induced blur and some very vivid and very scary memories.

I am also deeply aware that this story is not complete without a reflection on the people that are nearest and dearest to me (Carleen, James and Emma and my parents). They are always at the forefront of my mind in everything that I do and I want to weave this into this story.

These are all things that I will be exploring over the next few months or so. Where they appear in the story may not always make sense, but they all have a meaning to me and they are all part of the overall story. I hope that I can do them justice and that I can find the time to get it all down.

For now... GO THE ALL WHITES! Here's hoping for our first win at on the World Cup stage.